Friday, December 21, 2007

Top 10 Headlines I Hope I Don't Write in 2008

1) To get back at Heather Mills, Paul McCartney joins the new season of Dancing With the Stars.

2) Bon Jovi records a polka-influenced album called Lost Kielbasa.

3) The latest panty-less crotch shot on the ’Net? Joan Baez.

4) Chris Daughtry starts his own line of products for shaved heads. The first is called Generic Guy’s Gel.

5) The Hold Steady’s Craig Finn announces their next album will be all songs about Williamsburg.

6) Coldplay’s Chris Martin and actress Gwenyth Paltrow divorce. Both record solo albums about the break-up.

7) Midwestern moms are turning tricks for Miley Cyrus tickets.

8) Guns n’ Roses release Chinese Democracy—with a catch. The disc includes software that forces the user to finish the album themselves before they can listen to it.

9) Amy Winehouse and Britney Spears team up for an album of duets called The Scumbags We Loved.

10) Goo Goo Dolls frontman John Rzeznik is the judge on a new FOX reality show. (Crap, that actually did happen)

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